Creating Moments of Joy Along the Alzheimer's Journey by Jolene Brackey

Author:Jolene Brackey
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Purdue University Press

When I see a person as being unduly upset over a seemingly minor offense, in order to build rapport I will escalate my own emotional response to match theirs, validating what they’re experiencing. Bonding takes place, and then I can begin to de-escalate myself emotionally while remaining connected to the person. Frequently the person will follow me into a calmer emotional state. This is an example of extending true compassion toward a person with whom it can be difficult to feel generous. It’s just so much easier to condemn someone for their behavior and then retreat to the safety of our own superiority. But that is not the way we help someone who can’t connect effectively with others. They are just like us: they want connection and intimacy. But the world just doesn’t want to give it to them.

Jolene’s two cents: If a person becomes angry, fights, or yells for you to leave, do it! Honor their request. Stop the confrontation and leave. Return five minutes later with a different approach, or send a different caregiver, and see if you get a better reaction.

A gentleman had a tendency to hit when staff cared for him. A nutty caregiver, who was quite small, put her hair in pigtails, spoke like a child, and said with a hug, “Good morning, Grandpa!” She became the person he would not hit — a child.

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